Where does the personality go when you change genders?

I was married to a wonderful man but after 2 years he realized he was a woman trapped in a man's body. As well as physical changes their was personality changes which i didn't expect.

I'm just wondering if that is common and where did the male personality go. I don't have any problems with her and I understand that the change had to happen but I still grieve for him. How do I grieve when there is no death, no funeral.Where does the personality go when you change genders?
Likely, the male personality was a mask hiding who that woman really was. It can be a very real mask on some, since it's sort of a reflection of who they are... and also who they need to present as to get through life.



You can, and will, go through the grieving process the same way as if you had a funeral. Just... there is no body to lay to rest.



My mother went through a grieving process for many years for the loss of a child she didn't really have in me. It can be stressful, but if you give yourself enough time and allow yourself to go through the process how it feels right to you, you will be okay. You may even one day have a friendship with the woman who was formerly married to you.



Don't worry, you aren't alone in this. There are people you can talk to about your feelings.Where does the personality go when you change genders?
Try and talk to hir. I am so sorry. Tell hir about it. I'm sorry for your loss.
The male ';personality'; was just an act she put on. You're finally seeing the Real person for the first time. *Hugs* I know it's hard. Maybe the both of you could have a mock funeral for her old self. It will help both of you move on an it's something a lot of trans people have done. Bury a piece of paper with her old name on it in the yard an have a Eulogy or something similar.
That's a good question. I think they must have suppress their true self before
I would have to say that the person you knew then is the same as the one you know now. EVERYBODY changes with time. Male or female. In her case she was probably was not aware of who she was. It wasn't a change it was a realization. Most people figure out themselves through that transitional period of high school. For something so drastic as understanding your true gender...that takes time. I'm sorry that you got hurt in the process. You probably felt like you've been lied to. But imagine where she's coming from. Born in the body of a man, now trapped in a society that will never understand or accept her, and worse yet. Having to lose the closest person in the world to her.Of course there's got to be SOME change.



I wouldn't grieve your husband. I would embrace your new...whatever she is to you. Genitalia is just God's way of accessorizing. And rather than mourning the losses, which in life there are many. You should celebrate your joys, because there are very few. So don't grieve for the man you lost, rather rejoice for the woman you found.
awe, i feel for you, and i admire you for sticking around. as far as her personality, it went because the testosterone went. they get pretty selfish for a while too. for me, i feel like i'm pretty much the same, but when i hang around my old guy friends, i realize how much i've changed.



its gotta be hard, you fell in love with a MAN, not a woman. i really don't know how to deal with the loss, but its definitely real. :(
First, nobody ';changes genders';. Gender identity is inborn and unchangeable. The person you married was born female in a male body. It's best described as a brain-body mismatch.



Next, the male personality was a facade, a coping mechanism to help her survive in a hostile world.



Grieving is a necessary part of the process for people who knew the person that transitioned. It's very much like the process people go through when a person dies. The Kubler-Ross stages of grief are:



Denial



Anger



Bargaining



Depression



Acceptance



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/K%C3%BCbler



It sounds like you're in the bargaining stage. You'd like to have that person you knew back. I'm sorry, but that man is not coming back. You first have to realize he never really existed in the first place. Maybe you could talk with a therapist about your feelings. Talking with them will help you work through your grief. I know it's hard and confusing right now, but it will get better. You may even become friends with your former partner.





(((Hugs)))
The personality goes no where. It stays the same. Maybe she just realized her true personality and was tired of hiding it.
probably the hormones